Yesterday I wrote about how we have ingrained habits modeled since childhood to try to “get” love from others. Like you and everyone else, I find myself forgetting who I really am and trying to blame others for my own pinched off feelings of separation.
Today I want to write about how our love comes not from receiving from others, but rather from within our own wellspring of being.
Think about the last thing you appreciated so much you felt AWE well up within you. This, my friend, is your love! It happens when we feel appreciation for beauty, for kindness, for whimsy, strength, courage. It can even be measured by instruments measuring brainwaves and patterns, heart rate variability, and other physiological manifestations.
You might be thinking those responses are to an outside stimulus and while those stimuli CAN be a catalyst for the feeling, you can still create the feeling independent of the stimuli. Try it right now…think of someone you really adore. Maybe it is a pet. It could be someone who has passed, like a favorite Grandparent. Notice how that FEELS.
If you think about ANYTHING you really appreciate, your body will respond by releasing endorphins and other chemicals that affect your body in positive ways! When you first meet that someone special, you create an image of who and what you think they are and you APPRECIATE their inner and outer beauty.
Only it isn’t THEIR beauty (as anyone who is old enough to have seen the Twilight Zone episode “Beauty Is In The Eye Of The Beholder” knows ;-), it is YOUR OWN PERCEPTION and judgment of that beauty. YOU are creating that feeling within your own body, NOT the other person!
Think about this for a moment…if you got a text or email by mistake that you thought was from your lover saying they no longer loved you, and never wanted to speak to you again. You might be devastated. But if it was a mistake and the message was NOT from your lover, but from cyber space somehow sent to your mailbox by mistake, your lover STILL LOVES YOU. Nothing has changed but your own inner belief. If the love you experience actually CAME FROM THEM, then you would not have felt that pain at all.
We generate our own loving feelings so because as long as we have breath, we can APPRECIATE, the wellspring is infinite within us.
Today, go through your day finding things to appreciate about your surroundings. Look for things to appreciate in each person you see. Feel the love you can generate for yourself and notice how others are ATTRACTED to that vibration.
If you are in a love relationship, try shifting any negative thoughts about them to thoughts of appreciation (I don’t care if it is deep or superficial, just as long as it is sincere appreciation!). Notice how they respond to you SHARING your love instead of expecting to “get” love from them.
If you feel called to let me know how you experience your day, please leave a comment below. And really enjoy the flow of love you can generate within.